What Word Can Ruin Your Friendship?

There’s one word you might use often. It seems harmless even meaningless but…

This word is slowly, ruining your relationships. Any guesses?

If you guessed BUSY, you’d be correct

Look back at texts and emails…Have you used it? I can honestly say I have and now I feel horrible!

Why not to use it: It’s Open to (Negative) Interpretation:

The vague nature of saying “I’m really busy” leaves the real reason why you’re being unavailable open to interpretation. While many people will accept “being busy” as enough of a reason for not hanging out the first few times you use it, eventually your friends will see it as a veil over a more sinister reason for not hanging out. Maybe you don’t like them anymore and are too afraid to say it.

In other words, “busy” allows others to fill in the blank of your true intentions. Often, they will fill in the blank with something negative. In a worst case scenario, friends may feel like “being busy” is a way of blowing them off without having to state a reason for doing so.

How to change it: Be Specific:

There’s an easy way to eliminate the vagueness of “busy” and that’s by telling your friends specifically what you’re busy doing. Of course, being specific takes a bit more of your time and effort – something that can be challenging when you’re really swamped. But it’s worth doing because the difference in how the message is received is significant.

Let’s say you invite a friend to your birthday party and she writes back, “I’d love to but I’m really busy!” Alternatively, she writes back, “I’d love to but Jack has Karate that evening and he specifically asked me to watch him this time. Have some champagne for me though!”

Feel the difference? The second message explains your friend’s reasoning, gives context, and communicates that she’s still invested in your happiness. The first message, frankly, is a blow-off.

This great article is from Psychologytoday.com Click the link to read more!